With all the recent goings on over here, I lay in bed last night wondering. Wondering if and when I will ever accept that things are not how they used to be, they will never go back to how they were.

I don’t think for one second a year ago I was in any way, shape or form, normal. No way. I had so many different things happening inside me and no way to explain them all. However now I have a ‘reason’ as to why I was feeling and experiencing all these things, doesn’t make it any easier. I thought it would. I know the day I found out, as well as the sadness,anger and being scared I also felt relief, relief that now I could have the help I needed now there was a real reason as to why all these things were happening. The relief however was sort lived, it was simply followed by more sadness, pain and an unknown future.

The support I have from people close to me and the wonderful fellow bloggers has been amazing, everything that has been said I have taken in and sometimes it has even made me smile and relax. I am still no closer to accepting it.

Whilst laying in bed, wondering, I wondered how long was ‘normal’ how long does it ‘normally’ take people to become comfortable or accepting of this thing? I have known for nearly 6 months but it all still feel so brand new and fresh. Is this okay? I just can’t seem to shake it off.  

I guess part of me is starting to want to accept it but mentally I just can’t

2 thoughts on “Acceptance

  1. If it can help you, I have not accepted it either but I have learned to live with it. What I have accepted is that I have to listen to my body and stop when it tells me to. For me that’s the key. It took a while and a lot of wrong turns on the way but we got there and that’s how you learn to live with MS. Maybe try looking at it in a different way. I do know it’s difficult and will take time but you will get there and look at your fantastic children. They’ll never remember you not having MS, to them you’re ‘normal’ their fantastic mummy:) My children call my stick my 3rd leg, their friends think it’s normal I have it. I know it’s tough right now, I really do but I hope you’ll believe me when I say “you will get to where it’s just part of your life” Hope you have a great Sunday:) You’ve already come a long way in the process by being so honest on your blog:)

    1. Thank you. \i now writing it all down helps, as saying it sometime just isn’t enough. I am starting to listen to my body more. But I get so angry that sometimes I can’t finish something or do what I want to. I hate waiting for all everything to start up again after steroids, so I can have an MRI and finally have a treatment, well I pray.
      Thank ou fo being there, sometimes you do feel like the only person in the world x

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