I Am The Mum You Love To Hate!

Yup, I am the kind of Mum people love to hate, I am far from perfect and I refuse to pretend otherwise!

Some people find parenting as an amazingly wonderful experience,  their children are made of gold plated platinum and smell of Estee Lauder, they are potty trained from birth, shit roses and sleep all night and often have lie-ins.

My children are snotty little grebs who spend an inordinate amount of time picking their noses, burping and talking about poo! Beboo is obsessed with dog biscuits and makes a bee line every time the gate is left open and Pops makes it her life’s work to be the loudest child known to man with no real filter!

Some mothers bake all day and have the tidiest house. Washing is done, toilet is ready for the Queen to visit and Husbands are cleanly shaven and extraordinarily  happy. Beds are made and there is nothing crusty on any of the carpets. They go to WI and have regular coffee mornings in Starbucks.

Our house always has this constant battle going on, between crust, crumbs and the hoover, with the latter always coming out on top. My Husband and I do always have cleanly shaven heads, which for some is off putting and our love of tattoos make us top of everyone’s guest list! HA! Toilet humour and lack of personal space is something we thrive off. If you want to shut the toilet door, be prepared for Pops to drop by and judge the shape of your shit! Wormy or mountainous, she can name them all!

I shout and I get irate, albeit briefly and regretfully, there is also no real discipline  regime in this house either, we count down from 5 and have no idea what would happen if we got to 1, probably bribery.

I am not ashamed to say I have bad days and wonder who’s idea it was to have kids. 

With all this, I am still a Mum, a very different Mum but a Mum nonetheless! I need help and I am not afraid to ask for it. We are far from normal and I like it. The girls are happy, normal children, who will always be top of the priority list, I have holey pants and rank bras to prove it!  

Most of all though, we love each other an awful lot. I am so proud to be the crappy, over sharing, open Mum that I am, I would much rather be that than perfect, perfect is boring! 

Kids In Care

Okay, I’m not going to lie, I am sat here watching CBBC on iplayer. Why? Because I love Tracey beaker. 

Yes, ever since Danni Harman popped up on my screen many moons ago, I have been hooked and now, the new series The Dumping Ground is basically Tracey Beaker Returns, without Tracey Beaker.

As odd as it is without her, I think its still a great show.

Growing up I have to admit it did glamorise the whole ‘being in care’ thing. It made it look like a fun and happy place, like being at home and having parents was, well, boring?

However as the how has grown, it is nice to see some of the stories behind the care kids. Although they are fictional characters, I have no doubt there is some truth behind each and every background story. 

From and adult (or my) perspective, it makes you realise that not all homes are happy ones.

Sometimes it gets me wondering what goes on behind those front doors. Are there children happy like my own?

Our family life is far from perfect and I myself am a far from perfect mother, my MS often makes it hard to play or do all the things mums are supposed to do, however I always make sure the girls are happy, healthy and safe.

It sicken me to think other parents are not doing the same.

Although I know each and every person has their own story and problems, I still feel some bring it on themselves. I also feel that if you are ready to make and have children, you should look after them, put them first and be the parent they deserve.

Still, it makes you wonder, if everyone is the ‘perfect’ parent, why there are so many kids in care and stories of abuse and neglect in the news.

There is no excuse for causing a child to come to harm or neglect.

The Wright Stuff On Contraception Age 13

So this morning on The Wright Stuff, channel 5, you know the one, its on after milkshake!

So they were talking about girls from the age of 13 having contraception without parental consent. I found some of the views fairly old fashioned I have to say.

When I was 13 I have a long term boyfriend, we ended up being together for 4 years. As a 13 year old girl, I had sex, yes I know, how awful. However I did it, it happened.  

One of the times ‘it happened’ the condom broke, genuinely it broke. 

I have never been so scared in my whole life, I was a child too frightened to admit to her parents she was already having sex.

I was lucky enough to have a god father I was very close too, he came to the rescue and took me to the local Time4u clinic they next day, for little emergencies like this. 

I was given emergency contraception and I was put on the pill, all without telling my parents.

I was so incredibly thankful for this service. 

I ended up going on the injection at the age of 14, I found it easy and it suited me fine. I saw nothing wrong with being sensible and getting contraception even if my parents didn’t know.

If it wasn’t for services like this, I don’t know where I would have been.

I love my girls and want the best for them, so I really would not be against them having contraception without my knowledge  as long as it was from a medically trained person. 

I would rather them do this than end up pregnant and not wanting it.

I would not want that for my girls.

I don’t see why people are so concerned, I would be pleased that the girls were sensible enough to seek help.

How do you feel on the subject?

I’m Sorry

Today has been a bad MS day, days like these really do make you wonder why and how.

I often sit and wonder how I got here. How it was me who ended up having MS.

Some might say it was karma.

At times I might agree with them.

It makes you want to apologise for all you have done and all you now cannot do.

I am sorry for the lies I told.

I am sorry to the people I hurt.

I am sorry for not being ready.

I am sorry for for not loving my sister then, like I do now, for taking her for granted.

To my girls I am sorry for not being all I can be.

Sorry for bringing the nasty disease into their lives.

Sorry for being a burden now and in their future.

Sorry for the days when I simply just can’t.

To my husband I am sorry you had to care when you were young and now as you get older.

Sorry for not always being the best wife I can be.

Sorry to all of your for our future, I can’t see it being pretty.

I am most sorry for the fact the sorry is not enough, sorry will not make this go away.


Life’s critiques

I have recently found out someone did not enjoy my previous post About my mummy failings. 

They were so horrified in-fact they decided to create a post about it on mums forum. It was a very popular thread. All but the person that posted it was supportive and did not judge me, they read my whole story, not just one part. 

I do not see why people see the need to broadcast there ‘feelings’ so abruptly. My blog is here for me to document my journey. It is also here to raise awareness of MS and so people can see what living with a neurological condition is like. It is honest. It might make you cringe or laugh or even cry. But I am not about to be fake about something so very real. 

I am here for all the people, who like me, live daily with this condition. We have our good days and our bad. Big deal if we are not perfect, who is?

I hope the people who read this blog appreciate the honesty ad the fact I don’t, and won’t paper over the cracks.

Thank you for reading 🙂