If having children has taught me anything its that after having them, things start to go down south. Literally.
Yeh, I’m talking droop.
Be it, bum, boobs or indeed, stomach, they all decide to take a big old sign of relief and simply, ‘hang’.
So not only do I feel like the youngest person in the room, I also feel like I am having to hoick everything up every five minutes, So it does not spill out the sides. I am sure having all the droop automatically enables me to prove I am older than that 16 year old with long legs? Right?
I am almost certain I am one day, going to take off and fly into the sunset with my bingo wings, all the time trying to keep my tummy from smacking people on the head. No, it doesn’t bear thinking about does it?!
Its not something I ever really though about at the age on 19. I mean, you see wrinkles all over the TV, but never once does anyone ever whack out the old droop. It needn’t be full on boobage, a good tummy shot or ‘bum clappers’ would more than do!
FYI, if you think you may have fallen victim to the droop, and bum clappers are your given aliment, then please, do not wear leggins and a thong. It is not a good look for anyone plus there is such a thing as full pants.
VPL was once a fashionable thing don’t you know?!
Its certainly way more pleasing to the eye than bum clappers that look as though they have almost eaten your thong.
Don’t worry though, I feel your pain. We have to think about a whole different list of fashion blunders when the droop takes hold, including the ones that sneak up on us when we are simply enjoying ourselves.
It gives a whole new meaning to ‘letting it all hang out’
Even getting dressed is a mission these days and moist conditions almost always need the help of talc, its the only way we can get into these pull in pants without getting angry, causing sweat and making the whole scenario worse.
Yes, talc is my friend, our friend.
So, here I am. 24 and a victim to the good old droop. I completely blame my children and intend on letting them enjoy it just as much as me. Ah the fun
I we will have.
Watch this space!